Rag and Bone

It's ten days past my birthday, which is significant, and I'll get to that in a moment. But, this is a birthday post, so I'll talk about my birthday a bit. I'm 33, now. I think that becoming an adult is one of those things where few people actually feel like they are one, but at some point you look back and realize you have at least landed in their territory. Kind of like how you never really notice yourself tanning, or when the day was where your hair grows so long that you can part it, it just kinda happened along the way. I don't feel very adult, still, but I realized this month that I am deep in enemy territory.

I am looking at my Jeep and wondering if it's smart to trade it in for something more reliable and less gas expensive. This is not a thing I came to wonder on my own, but rather was forced on me by the Jeep itself. Given my way, I'd just have this Jeep forever, or until it rattles apart. But, things are getting more expensive, gas is going up, and my effective salary went down (taxes yay). So when faced with the choice of wtf to do, the car comes up.

In addition to that, I had to visit the doctor on the 7th, with my birthday being on the 8th. The diagnosis was that a minor internal infection had spiraled out of control mostly due to the poor attention I give myself. Again, something I would have happily continued doing if I was not forced to consider alternatives. Instructions: ten days of no alcohol due to the antibiotics, but DOUBLY so due to the dehydration. So no coffee either. And probably best to avoid anything sugary when drinking. For awhile. So that meant I got to go through my birthday sober - an interesting experience. Something I'd recommend everyone try at least once, but probably no more than that.

Pic I saved from my 30th

A lot of folks came by the house for my birthday, which was technically a two day affair. The party was Friday night, on the actual day, Folks came over and we shared the party with Claire, who had recently turned 30. This particular major milestone was stained by the loss of one of her dogs, sadly, so I don't think she was in much of a celebratory mood even a week later. I think back to my own 30th birthday, and that was one of the first things I had done with Claire and how it was really great to have so many friends out just having a good time. I don't suppose you should wait for certain special occasions  though, to make memories like that. But, it's just better that way (or easier) sometimes. So to lose an opportunity like that sucks. It's something you don't get back every again - it is permanently written that a particular milestone passed that way. No do-overs.

So with all that in mind, it was good to see several folks I hadn't seen in awhile then. We're not all best friends or even really close anymore, but it's fine. Not all your friends can be people you can trust to hide the bodies. It's good to have people you just know and like well enough. The world doesn't have to be a roster of people who only fit on a roster of "perfect human being, through and through," or "enemy of all things right and noble".

The next day was a full day marathon of all three Lord of the Rings extended versions. Ben, Nikki, Stephen, Tony, and Brenna came over. Ben, Brenna, and Tony couldn't stay all day, but the rest of us muddled through.

I don't know why I don't write about Stephen more. Maybe I'm afraid I'll jinx it. I should put it down somewhere so I don't forget, I guess. That's the point of these things. Stephen was there, things were good. Two days, and the Sunday after, I think. It's hard to remember as the whole weekend was a bit of a blur. It really feels like the birthday stretched out over three days. Maybe it did. Maybe this is the big one that I thought 30 would be. The whole "adult birthday".

I was sober. This is not a good omen. But I was aware of everything, kind of like adults are purported to be. I knew what was happening, and I wasn't trying to just pretend shit was ok and everything would work itself out - the car, the house, personal stuff, work. I was perfectly aware where it all was, and I was okay with it. The things that are good, I'm happy for. The stuff that needs work, I can work on. The stuff that has to go is making itself very obvious. And that's alright, too.